--------------------------------------
I was not C
The one she loved
Her heart was yours
Oh! hanging judge
I stole her like F
Europa
Like I stole the moon
And I stole the sun
She did not A
Deserve to die
I cast her fragments
Towards the sky
To remind you of G
Just what you've done
What i'm guilty of
But can't quite give a fuck
(X)
4
--------------------------------------
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Coast still clear...
Well this is kind of a relief. for the first time in the last few months, or... last month... i guess. Has it really only been one month?
Still, this is the first time since i've seen him that i've been able to have some peace and think about things clearly. I've taken the time and gone through most of the blogs on here trying to get some kind of bearing.
Regardless of your thoughts on it, it's a real load off my mind to hear what Ray has to say about revenants. Things seem a lot more manageable without super-powered proxies running around. Still super-powers or not i have no interest in meeting up with Mr. Smelly-Operater-Hoody again.
What does worry me about what he has to say is how much slender-fuck can mess with someone's head. especially to the extent of altering Ray's memory to where he has memories of all those years under slendy that never even happened. It makes me think about my stint in jail.
Speaking of Ray my heart goes out to him on the situation with Ava
Well i've spent enough time yesterday reading up on "Current Events" and getting supplies together in case i need to get going again. I think today i'll spend sleeping and maybe reading or playing guitar. Hell, maybe i'll even dust off my old PS2...
Poprocks and Coke,
~Rivka
explains all that time
again and again
on repeat
like a broken record
watching me bleed
in that bloody cell
my insides
inside
fucking
garbage bags
-----------------------------
him
watching... smiling
Still, this is the first time since i've seen him that i've been able to have some peace and think about things clearly. I've taken the time and gone through most of the blogs on here trying to get some kind of bearing.
Regardless of your thoughts on it, it's a real load off my mind to hear what Ray has to say about revenants. Things seem a lot more manageable without super-powered proxies running around. Still super-powers or not i have no interest in meeting up with Mr. Smelly-Operater-Hoody again.
What does worry me about what he has to say is how much slender-fuck can mess with someone's head. especially to the extent of altering Ray's memory to where he has memories of all those years under slendy that never even happened. It makes me think about my stint in jail.
Speaking of Ray my heart goes out to him on the situation with Ava
Well i've spent enough time yesterday reading up on "Current Events" and getting supplies together in case i need to get going again. I think today i'll spend sleeping and maybe reading or playing guitar. Hell, maybe i'll even dust off my old PS2...
Poprocks and Coke,
~Rivka
explains all that time
again and again
on repeat
like a broken record
watching me bleed
in that bloody cell
my insides
inside
fucking
garbage bags
-----------------------------
him
watching... smiling
Diana...
)----------------------
)-8---------8---------
)---7---7----7-------- (X) 8
)-----5------------5---
)---------------6---
)---------------------
)-88---66---88---55---88---66---55---5588--
)-88---88---88---77---88---88---77---5577-
)-77---88---77---77---77---88---77---7755---
)-55---77---55---55---55---77---55---7755--
)-66---55---66---55---66---55---55---6655-
)-55---55---55---55---55---55---55---5588--
______________________________
Echo
repeat after me [)(] I can't find E(X) harmony A8 Splintered and broken D7 5 empty and hollow (x) i'm not worth saving (x) even if you follow me home(X) (8)(X)
8
8
(x) (X) (8)
(X)
(x) // (x) (4)
Saturday, March 19, 2011
He's gone
*does little happy dance*
I woke up this morning, a triumph in and of itself, looked outside to check if he was there and he's wasn't. I looked out through all the other windows in the house and he wasn't there either. I was even dumb enough to go outside and check all the way around the building.
I am Slender free today.
I woke up this morning, a triumph in and of itself, looked outside to check if he was there and he's wasn't. I looked out through all the other windows in the house and he wasn't there either. I was even dumb enough to go outside and check all the way around the building.
I am Slender free today.
Friday, March 18, 2011
Hey there. I'll try and type this out while i can.
I made it back to the Philly area, I'm not quite sure how, I really can't remember any of it. But i'm here in my comfortable bed with my comfortable covers pulled over my head, typing away on my laptop while a fucking piece of crap fucktard with NO FACE AND MOTHER FUCKING BUSINESS SUIT, stands outside my window.
My families gone. I don't know where. They aren't here though, all the cars are in the driveway. No notes. It's been Days? Weeks? I don't even know when I got here.
I brought everything i need up to my room, food, drinks, caffeine, more pills than you can shake a stick at. Only reason i'm lucid right now is cause I shoveled who knows how many pills down my gullet.
I wish i could say i did it on purpose and was thinking clearly but my thought process was probably less "I think this'll sober me up" and more "ooh!-I-have-no-clue-what they-are-but-they're-so-shiny-so-'nom'".
Retarded me is retarded.
To be honest though, i have enough meds, alchohol, and caffeine gathered up here i'm tempted to just down it all and let the coroner sort it all out. Maybe if it wouldn't make slenderfuck outside so damn pleased.
Fuck it.
Here's to hoping for some sleep.
I made it back to the Philly area, I'm not quite sure how, I really can't remember any of it. But i'm here in my comfortable bed with my comfortable covers pulled over my head, typing away on my laptop while a fucking piece of crap fucktard with NO FACE AND MOTHER FUCKING BUSINESS SUIT, stands outside my window.
My families gone. I don't know where. They aren't here though, all the cars are in the driveway. No notes. It's been Days? Weeks? I don't even know when I got here.
I brought everything i need up to my room, food, drinks, caffeine, more pills than you can shake a stick at. Only reason i'm lucid right now is cause I shoveled who knows how many pills down my gullet.
I wish i could say i did it on purpose and was thinking clearly but my thought process was probably less "I think this'll sober me up" and more "ooh!-I-have-no-clue-what they-are-but-they're-so-shiny-so-'nom'".
Retarded me is retarded.
To be honest though, i have enough meds, alchohol, and caffeine gathered up here i'm tempted to just down it all and let the coroner sort it all out. Maybe if it wouldn't make slenderfuck outside so damn pleased.
Fuck it.
Here's to hoping for some sleep.
Monday, March 14, 2011
Oh, Diana!
Artemis, hear my plea,
you are stealing all my dreams.
I just want to go to sleep,
but i'm a record on repeat.
I don't need you
i'll concede to you.
but, oh Callisto,
how i want to...
you are stealing all my dreams.
I just want to go to sleep,
but i'm a record on repeat.
I don't need you
i'll concede to you.
but, oh Callisto,
how i want to...
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
i think i've hit the bend...
I need someplace to go
I have my bag, I lost most of my stuff though I have my laptop, and I'm leeching internet off some non-security minded suburbanite. I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHERE I AM!!!
I'm gonna try and cross-reference some intersection names in google maps, Is this still PA?
Things haven't exactly been going my way. Lost time's a bitch. only reason I know when it is, is cause of the clock on my computer. My pocket watch is dead. blown open like there was a little firecracker inside it. I have all the pieces of it still, I think. I hope I can fix it. I love that thing. Someone important gave it to me. Important.
I haven't seen Him since I woke up this last time. I don't have any more money. I can't remember anything since I posted last, and I DON'T want to get into what happened before-hand. I mean, I at least have some recall of it. I don't know how i got of prison though. it's just....it's good to be out of there.
I can't be alone anymore. Echo or Stormy or somebody, I can't stay out here wherever it is. Something's Broken. Disjointed. I don't know.
Just come quick
I have my bag, I lost most of my stuff though I have my laptop, and I'm leeching internet off some non-security minded suburbanite. I DON'T FUCKING KNOW WHERE I AM!!!
I'm gonna try and cross-reference some intersection names in google maps, Is this still PA?
Things haven't exactly been going my way. Lost time's a bitch. only reason I know when it is, is cause of the clock on my computer. My pocket watch is dead. blown open like there was a little firecracker inside it. I have all the pieces of it still, I think. I hope I can fix it. I love that thing. Someone important gave it to me. Important.
I haven't seen Him since I woke up this last time. I don't have any more money. I can't remember anything since I posted last, and I DON'T want to get into what happened before-hand. I mean, I at least have some recall of it. I don't know how i got of prison though. it's just....it's good to be out of there.
He's watching.
Fuck
I can't be alone anymore. Echo or Stormy or somebody, I can't stay out here wherever it is. Something's Broken. Disjointed. I don't know.
Just come quick
Sunday, March 6, 2011
I'm out...
... That's all you need to know
A broken record, Broken more with each
repeat. Broken thing standing on her own
two feet. Begging release by painless sleep.
Till he offers, opens his coffers, home
in exchange for hearth’s newest, bright, purist
flame. “Tiny spark” He sings out, coos softly.
“Which path is fairest, Though mine be furthest
When respite means only not dying slowly”
And repeat and repeat. Vinegar turns
sickly sweet. Traps flies and martyrs alike
with a breath of relief as they both burn
and repeat and repeat. Losing their sight,
while the rending flesh she can’t help but hear.
Bargains and backdoors close shop out of fear.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Heading out... again
Ok so , long story short, i'm heading to New York to try and help Echo care for Stormy.
I got to Pittsburgh ok, and stayed with my friend Mandarin. She's a real peach, let me spend the last couple days in her dorm room while she had classes. I slept. It was glorious. Haven't seen Slendy the whole time on account of me spending the entire visit asleep or indoors, though from things Manda has said about noises i'm pretty sure he's been around.
Luckily, for me at least,her roommate's home for a funeral or something. Before you call me tactless, while i respect her loss, i'm simply really happy that i could use her bed for the last few days and not have to deal with the awkward questions.
Manda knows i'm in some kind of trouble (probably thinks i was kicked out again) and has been pushing at it herself. I told her i'd tell her what was going on and where i was headed tomorrow, but i'm leaving tonight. It's better for her not to know, right?
Didn't even say where i was going, so she can't tell my family where there darling daughter is off to.
Poprocks and coke, guys.
Off to New York I go!
I got to Pittsburgh ok, and stayed with my friend Mandarin. She's a real peach, let me spend the last couple days in her dorm room while she had classes. I slept. It was glorious. Haven't seen Slendy the whole time on account of me spending the entire visit asleep or indoors, though from things Manda has said about noises i'm pretty sure he's been around.
Luckily, for me at least,her roommate's home for a funeral or something. Before you call me tactless, while i respect her loss, i'm simply really happy that i could use her bed for the last few days and not have to deal with the awkward questions.
Manda knows i'm in some kind of trouble (probably thinks i was kicked out again) and has been pushing at it herself. I told her i'd tell her what was going on and where i was headed tomorrow, but i'm leaving tonight. It's better for her not to know, right?
Didn't even say where i was going, so she can't tell my family where there darling daughter is off to.
Poprocks and coke, guys.
Off to New York I go!
Monday, February 28, 2011
Should I stay or should i go now...
So, on the advice of Echo, i'm getting the hell out of here. I've stopped sleeping, cold turkey, and am increasingly worried about my family. my parents are oblivious so that's a saving grace, but what worries me the most is my little sister. I mean even I know how slender fuck feels about kids her age. it's something I have to acknowledge but don't want to think about.
The scary thing is that there were signs of slendy here before my ill advised trip to new york. I may have mentioned that I'm staying in a rental home at the moment, until recently this was my sister's room. We switched because she was scared of the dark and my parents wanted her closer to their room.
Hahahaha. The dark. Right...
I'm hoping that by getting gone that he'll leave her alone. I'm a bigger target now so fucking come and get me asshole.
It feels good to say that.
Any way I'm taking my car up to pittsburgh tonight, driving till dawn. where I'll stay with a friend. Maybe after I get there I'll think of something productive to do, but at the moments most plans revolve around trying to meet up with Echo and Stormecho if they'll have me. Wouldn't blame them if they didn't. Especially after the whole proxy prank...
The scary thing is that there were signs of slendy here before my ill advised trip to new york. I may have mentioned that I'm staying in a rental home at the moment, until recently this was my sister's room. We switched because she was scared of the dark and my parents wanted her closer to their room.
Hahahaha. The dark. Right...
I'm hoping that by getting gone that he'll leave her alone. I'm a bigger target now so fucking come and get me asshole.
It feels good to say that.
Any way I'm taking my car up to pittsburgh tonight, driving till dawn. where I'll stay with a friend. Maybe after I get there I'll think of something productive to do, but at the moments most plans revolve around trying to meet up with Echo and Stormecho if they'll have me. Wouldn't blame them if they didn't. Especially after the whole proxy prank...
Friday, February 25, 2011
Dude... where's my house?
This is right under my bedroom window, where i heard all those crashing noises coming from...
How'd i sleep through what ever caused this
I know it's terribly cliche but, shit just got real.
Really never should have gotten involved in any of this at all.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
What does it mean to be alive and well...
Look, i want to be honest. I didn't intend to take any of this seriously.
I mean, I only started a blog on here to vent at Echo for running off and filling my head with all these scary stories. I was gonna pollute cyberspace with yet another single post blog, and leave it at that.
But as is obvious, there was a change of plans.
I feel really silly saying this, internet though it may be. i really have no option but to believe you guys and all this stuff your posting about.
I got attacked the other day, i mean it was kinda my own damn fault, but still... it was... unsettling.
After seeing Echo's post about visiting Stormecho in NYC, she had let me know her travel itinerary in case i wanted to meet up with her on her way there. A friendly face and all that jazz.
I thought it'd be a lot funnier to get the jump on her and play a little prank. So i grabbed my self an old baggy hoodie (chalking a nice big Operator Symbol on it), a trucker hat, and a pair of aviators and packed up all my school work, heading off to Trenton Rail Station. I sat around for hours reading my text books, and doing homework at the track for Penn Station, waiting for Echo to show up. Eventually she did. After i spent my entire day there. Apparently she missed a train or two on the way...
I ended up getting on the train with her, keeping my self at a fair distance and my face obscured, faking her out a couple times, staring at her and turning away suddenly, as she noticed. I could barely keep my self from laughing the look on her face was priceless. until, about an hour in, i noticed a guy wearing exactly what i was wearing, sans the shades. Including the Operator Symbol.
And when i saw him .... the fucker winked at me. and saddled up beside me. He smelled. Really badly. Like he'd spent days and days in his own filth. Almost laughing pretty much turned into almost gagging. I didn't know what to do. I had reached the point of no return monetarily and would have turned around, but i couldn't leave Echo alone with this freak stalking her.
The freak that wasn't me, anyway...
So i ended up following her to Penn Station with the smelly stalker guy practically glued to my hip. Eventually she either tried to lose us or just had to go pee, and headed into one of terminal's ladies rooms. Now if he had any of the built-in decency that guys should have (but don't), he wouldn't have started walking casually into there after her. Now i don't know why it freaked me out so much, but him starting to follow after her into there brought me from 'freaking out' to 'freaking the fuck out' , and i went and yanked his collar and pulled him back yelling "no" at him in as big a voice as i could muster.
Obviously i wasn't thinking straight. I started walking away, as he sort of just stood there for a good thirty seconds. Then, like a shot he starts turns around, and tries to grab at me. at the same moment i start to run from him, just in time to keep him from getting at my body but he ends up catching on to my messenger bag, and tearing right through the strap. sending all my stuff clattering against the floor. He keeps right on after me.
I book, faster than i have ever in my life and get on the first train i can, leaving right before he's able to get on. And get thrown off at the first stop since i didn't have enough money for a ticket. Or a pay phone.
I also was given a rude lesson in trying to ask a new yorker to borrow their cell phone.
And that's why i ended up spending a terrifying night in central park. I mean if your homeless, or at least temporarily roofless, in new york, that's where you go, right?
Luckily i was able to scrounge up enough change the next morning, outside some of the street cafes, to call my folks for a ride. I almost ran into mr. smelly at one point while i was picking up pavement pennies. it scared the crap out of me and i froze up for a couple minutes before i got my wits together and walked away slowly so he wouldn't notice. luckily nothing else happened till my parents came.
As to be expected i'm kind of in the dog house at the moment because of the whole running off to new york unannounced thing. Normally that'd bother me a lot, but what i can't wrap my head around is this, the whole time i laid there on that bench in central park. waiting for morning to come, He was there, watching me. Suit guy from the park, i recognized him, but he was a lot closer this time. I could see his face this time, and to be honest the lack of one made me shiver a lot more than the cold did. as the sun came up, he just cocked his head at me and walked away into the tree line.
You guys were right, and i was wrong, I thought this was some dumb game Echo was playing at, but now i'm deeply deeply concerned about what that means. There's no wind tonight but the crashing against my window is even louder for it and i keep hearing "rat-tat-tat" at my bedroom door. The worst part is i know my family is all down stairs, i can hear my little sister playing her violin and my father telling her to keep practicing. If he's out there, then he's out there with them.
I've had auditory hallucinations before, when i'm stressed or sleep-deprived, but i've never, "seen" anything before. Let alone for the whole night. Maybe i'm just rattled from the adventure on the train. The guy could have just been yet another psych ward patient thrown out on the streets and i could just be seeing things. I really don't feel like taking my chances though. If this is all fake you can get you're cheap laughs at my expense later, but i'd prefer to be not dead than a fool, so as per marble hornets i'm going to set my webcam up to keep watch over my room for me as i get a little sleep. I fucking need it.
~Poprocks and coke,
Rivka
Monday, February 21, 2011
ugh...
...my head is spinning from insomnia, you have no idea, well maybe you do if all these blogs are to be believed, but i mean, fuck. it's been a rough few nights for sure, i ask way to many questions. ask a friend why they're packing their bags, and why they're suddenly running off.
these seem like perfectly reasonable questions.
hell i only find out she's off to Seattle cause i find her blog on here
why couldn't she just say "grunge revival," i'd ask her to get me some vintage flannel
haha, well if you're in Seattle, Echo, why not
but no, she's all, "i'm needed," natters on about some slender man. some blog on here, i didn't know what to think. telling me to stay away from playgrounds and woods and to stay up high.
what would you do
what would you think
whatever, i'm suppossed to introduce myself, right?
i'm Rivka.
i play crappy indie-punk music
i write crappy short stories, poems, sitcoms, and comics
i have a crazy ass friend that runs off to Seattle and has me jumping at shadows.
i mean i'm not normally one of those stereotypically easily scared or easily grossed-out girls
so after an internet binge of slender man stories, and a quick go through of her blog and the other ones on here, i shouldn't be as jumpy as i am.
but i am.
so much for my horror-buff cred.
i mean honestly i'm talking about what to make of all this slender man crap with one of my friends, and as i explain it to her, i realize i'm looking past every tree in Tyler park for the fuck.
i mean one time i swear i saw it, but that doesn't make any sense, it was just some dude in a suit, i mean it's weird to be wearing a suit out in the woods, but god knows i've worn weirder for film shoots.
they were probably just making a movie or something. i couldn't see the guy with a camera though, they were really far away.
look it's late, i have class tomorrow and all this stuff is keeping me up and making me swear and generally be a crank-pot. all these scary stories, and the wind, and the damn branches crashing against my upstairs windows are driving me nuts and kept me from sleeping this whole weekend. i'm going downstairs and sleeping on the sofa tonight.
ugh... i'm so used to my old house, there aren't even trees in the yard, that noise iss probably more of the siding tearing off and banging against the rental house again,shit. i'll have to tell my dad in the morning when i wake up, he's gonna be pissed.
~poprocks and coke,
Rivka
these seem like perfectly reasonable questions.
hell i only find out she's off to Seattle cause i find her blog on here
why couldn't she just say "grunge revival," i'd ask her to get me some vintage flannel
haha, well if you're in Seattle, Echo, why not
but no, she's all, "i'm needed," natters on about some slender man. some blog on here, i didn't know what to think. telling me to stay away from playgrounds and woods and to stay up high.
what would you do
what would you think
whatever, i'm suppossed to introduce myself, right?
i'm Rivka.
i play crappy indie-punk music
i write crappy short stories, poems, sitcoms, and comics
i have a crazy ass friend that runs off to Seattle and has me jumping at shadows.
i mean i'm not normally one of those stereotypically easily scared or easily grossed-out girls
so after an internet binge of slender man stories, and a quick go through of her blog and the other ones on here, i shouldn't be as jumpy as i am.
but i am.
so much for my horror-buff cred.
i mean honestly i'm talking about what to make of all this slender man crap with one of my friends, and as i explain it to her, i realize i'm looking past every tree in Tyler park for the fuck.
i mean one time i swear i saw it, but that doesn't make any sense, it was just some dude in a suit, i mean it's weird to be wearing a suit out in the woods, but god knows i've worn weirder for film shoots.
they were probably just making a movie or something. i couldn't see the guy with a camera though, they were really far away.
look it's late, i have class tomorrow and all this stuff is keeping me up and making me swear and generally be a crank-pot. all these scary stories, and the wind, and the damn branches crashing against my upstairs windows are driving me nuts and kept me from sleeping this whole weekend. i'm going downstairs and sleeping on the sofa tonight.
ugh... i'm so used to my old house, there aren't even trees in the yard, that noise iss probably more of the siding tearing off and banging against the rental house again,shit. i'll have to tell my dad in the morning when i wake up, he's gonna be pissed.
~poprocks and coke,
Rivka
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)